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Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - I was looking through the forum subjects and when I came upon this one and looked I wondered why I hadn't commented, since I am a swinger and am poly for quite a few years and I am involved with 2 women as secondary relationships. Someone said "poly is about being monogomous within a plural relationship." The term monogamous doesn't even enter into poly. Poly relationships can be primary, secondary or tertiary. Further people can be added on add-infinitem, so long as everyone involved in particularly primary and soemtimes secondary relationships are consentual about that aspect. In tertiary relationships it is necessary that that they be aware of all other relaionships and OK with that concept.
I also belong to a Poly group that is not like Yahoo or AOL groups. It is privately owned and is open to poly and poly friendly people. While I know that a small number of the group does swing, they do not advertise. Poly people generally take issue with swinging as be strictly recreational SEX! and no love where as poly, supposedly, is love based not necessarily any sex....but sex usually is involved at some level. The attitude is that swinging is not a good thing that swinging is diametrically opposed to poly.
We definitely do swing and I have 2 secondary relationships. One could be a primary if she could get over the hurt from a failed..abusive marriage of 18 years. We met thru swinging and will continue until I can't walk talk or motovate. My wife while not professing to be poly is in love with that lady as well as I am. We would invite her to join us as a primary relationship and have mentioned that to her... She is afraid to "lay my heart out and have it stomped on again".
So while there are some similarities in swinging and poly in that more and more swingers are looking for relationships, i.e., "friends with benefits" ; "Friends in and out of the bedroom". These friendships are based on attraction and sex after the attraction. Poly people take the concept that poly is based on loving someone and if sex happens then OK, but that love is the key and sex is at best secondary. I don't have any problems with poly and swinging. We have met people while swinging and I have fallen in love or they have fallen in love with my wife or me.
Swinging and poly are definitely compatable..at least for us.
What is is with local couples? - Anyone else seem to have the problem with couples local to where you live NOT wanting to meet? - Common decency...What is that? Ignoring someone's email seems to be the way to NOT say they are not interested...Seems plain old rude...especially when there is an easy no thanks email already written for you on here...
Anyway...If you ever get to FL SWMTCPL...We would not ignore you ;)
Also...he thinks there are a lot of "fantasy swingers" on these sites...they are all about the fantasy...BUT when it comes down to it...they are not ready or willing to do anything...Rather than say so, they ignore you...Just HIS opinion
Honesty - parallels? - The topic of honesty (more accurately, lack thereof) has been prevalent in recent political posts - for good reason. Everyone would like to see more openness and honesty from the candidates.
That sounds similar to one of the most common complaints among swingers.
Here's the question - Does anyone think that a person could win the SURVIVOR TV game on a platform of "honesty"?
Personally, I think it highly unlikely.
Honesty in politics? Honesty in swinging? Honesty in game playing?
Any chance?
Why are there so many swingers from Utah? - - Well I think that all of the bases have been covered. Swingular is run out of Utah, it's conservative, we have built up tenstion, the religion... the fact of the matter is WE (As A Couple) are not sure why Swingular is so populated with Utahns. We aren't sure if we even really care. All we do know is that we're loving this site and we thank GOD that there are so many Utahns, because if there wasn't, we'd be S. O. L. We're a happy couple of newbies here. :D
D & F
New Messenger Website for Swingers - By Swingular - Glad to see that we now have our own messenger site to chat on. However we'd like to know if there will be direct links to profiles and would also know when we will be able to upload our photos to our messenger profile.
Vegas: Swingers circle or couples oasis? - Which do I prefer - H2O, Couples is about 10 minutes from the Strip. It is southwest of the end of the Strip. It is a private house with a big parking lot in back (gravel, so ladies watch those heels or get dropped off by the entrance). The way in is not at the front of the house, it is actually in the driveway past the garage area (that are now play rooms).
Contact them at couplesoasis.com and they can give you directions/info.
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - TPAFUNLUVNCPL2,
It's a preference thing. You are making a statement that covers how those in men in a couple feel that want to have another female to play with. That isn't always the case. There are tons of people out there that are seeking single males. You can pigeon hole everyone into what you think is acceptable. Just because you don't prefer them, doesn't mean others don't. Have an open mind and realize that we're not all here for the same reasons.
You mentioned what do single men bring. What if a guy is trying to please his wife and she wants to MFM and the idea also turns him on, to watch her being DP'd or perhaps he wants to watch or be the cuckold. There is a very diverse people with regard to ssexuality here.
-D-
fantasy football league free trying to get only swingers in leag - free autodraft fantasy football league - We have never played but have signed up and willing to learn. Our team is CFLDOLFANS.
Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - The only way any relationship works is mutual respect/love/caring/communication. It doesn't matter if it's a marriage, LTR, or any other possible configuration. As proof I would submit that 60+ to 70+ percentage of marriages, both first and second, fail in the "normal" world. Also in poles taken, 60 to 70% of all married people or people in relationships have had relationships outside of marriage without their partner's knowledge.....i.e., "CHEATING". Swingers can hardly cheat, although it sometimes happens... Divorce in the swinging community is about one quarter of that in the "normal" community. I would submit that the reason for this is
a. the partners respect and love and trust each other as no other group does.
b. the need or want to cheat is virtually eliminated...
c. communication needed for the trust and the ability to work thru hard relationship problems is in place and working well
d. RESPECT for each other as individuals is greatly enhanced. Jealousy is part fear and part possessivness... Fear of loosing, fear that someone is better, fear that they are inadequate.. and many more fears are basiclly absent. And possessivness is not possible if you and your wife or SO are sharing yourself with others.
One thing about swinging.... If your relationship is good, communications are good and your sex life is good .....Swinging might very well work for you, as a couple. If there are any problems, fix them first or stay out of swinging... A good relationship will generall be enhanced by swinging. A relationship with problems will generally magnify problems introduce problems and ultimately cause devistation in that relationship.
You life coach has their head where the sun doesn't shine...and knows not of what he spake...
Amen
KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - [quote=JANDNK]It's too bad. They had an opportunity to expose more people to a healthy, vibrant, valid lifestyle choice. Instead it appears they will fear monger and use the states natural prejudices to present a skewed and irrational viewpoint from a person who could very well only be attributing their marriages demise to swinging purely to deflect from any other problem that could have been present. Not to mention that she is essentially an anonymous source and unless they can provide any validation for her story it may as well be entirely fiction. Of course it is on local news in Utah so most likely the only people who will be watching it won't know how to work a computer.[/quote]
Actually, most of those people watch Fox News so they can get to bed an hour early. I know my parents do. They do, however, know how to work (sorta) a computer...even if they have to call me up every so often and ask me what their password is. [em]Emo_49[/em]
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