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Singles who are married and cheating - - better get a cup of coffee cuz this is gonna be a long read:
there are a few things you have to take into consideration when you decide to be in the swinging lifestyle. i think the biggest thing is finding out if your spouse is into it. most people, i think, go into a relationship knowing what their spouses boundries are. and then there are couples who evolve in their relationship and the more trust they have in their relationship, i would think it would be like a "coming out" of sorts. like..."hey, um...honey...the johnsons next door are having a party this weekend...and we were invited" "Really?" "Yeah, and i hear its one of THOSE kinda parties" "well, honey..we better wear our crotchless underwear" i dunno..something like that..like, at some point you decide that swinging is for you, right? or you go into a relationship knowing that swinging is an option.
buuuuuuuuuuuutttttt...
if you go into a relationship knowing that swinging is definetly not what your spouse is into or in the evolution of your relationship you decide swinging is right for you, and your spouse isnt into it, and under no circumstance is it ok....then, in my humble opinion, you arent in the lifestyle. now, if you come to some sort of open relationship agreement if your spouse isnt into it but agrees to let you get some strange, fine. if you take it upon yourself to sign up for a swinging website behind your spouses back, hook up with couples behind your spouses back, then YOU ARE CHEATING!
if you are cheating, then you are just asking for trouble:
1. you are being dishonest
2. you are bringing your drama into someone elses life whether they know it or not. what happens if the wife finds out and shows up at your house party with a shotgun?
3. what happens if you get an s.t.d.? you bring that home with you to your spouse, and if you have them, your children. even if you use condoms you can still get s.t.d.'s, its happened.
4. when your spouse does find out, and they will...you are humiliating them in front of their friends, family, job...cuz somehow they all find out. that leads me to believe you have no regard for someone elses feelings so why would i want to swing with you?
5. you are giving other single people, male or female, a bad name and reputation.
6. you are giving swingers in general a bad name and reputation.
jenn and i are honest with each other. we are not in a place where we are gonna swing separate, we communicate and talk things out so we have a full understand of where eachother is at, at any given moment. if jenn or i didnt want to swing anymore, or if we wanted a break from it, we talk about it. we arent perfect by any means, but we do our best to consider eachothers feelings in this lifestyle.
we dont invite drama into our lives so i would have to say...no, we dont swing with someone who is cheating on their spouse. we would both suggest that if you feel the need to cheat that you should either talk it out with your spouse and seek external help or if you dont think that will help, you should consider ending the relationship. this is all just our opinion. we know its easier written or said than done. but if you arent happy with your spouse, why would you drag them down with this? communicate..compromise...talk it out..but dont be a cheater, cuz its not cool.
brandon
Playing with \"swingers\" vs \"nonswingers\" - - Okay this probably doesnt make alot of sense, but here goes.
We went to the bar the other night and met some new folks, regular guys that aren\'t in the lifestyle- that is they are just regular single young guys. I love to flirt so I had picked out a particular nice guy and we were playing pool etc. Well I happened to mention that hubby and I were swingers etc....
Now my question is, do you only play with someone else who\'s into the lifestyle? This guy really wanted to get in on some action with me and now thinking about it, I just feel nervous. It has brought back old anxieties about when I was single and all the single assholes out there that were looking to just get laid and kick you to the curb. At least in this lifestyle, you get to know people and there is a certain kind of understanding about sex and you usually know that the person you will be fucking cares about you in some respect.
I am trying to make a decision about whether to let this guy in or not for some play. I just can\'t decide how I feel about it.
Any input would be appreciated!!!
XOXOXO
Jen
Scuba, Nude Beaches, Swingers - Scuba, Nude Beaches, Swingers - We also love to dive and was thinking how much fun it would be to do a livaboard trip with swingers. I dont know of any outfits that would possibly allow it but think it would be fun. We spent 7 days on the Cat Pallue in the Bahamas diving the Exumas what a blast. Anyways if something comes about with a nude cruise let us know.
Politics / Religion and the LS - - [quote=EVILDOERS]When you think about it, with all the major, minor, overt or unspoken, and even subconscious qualifiers and disqualifiers that people in the lifestyle use to determine who is 'fuck-worthy', it's amazing that ANYONE is having any kind of naughty swinger sex! HaHa
We've often said (And yes, we've been guilty of this as well.) that many swingers often spend more time looking for reasons NOT to fuck rather than looking FOR reasons to fuck. That seems kinda like the antithesis of swinging when you really think about it. Judging by the tone and rhetoric (And, again, I have been just as guilty.) of recent threads, those in positions of power and influence who would seek to divide us for their personal gain have succeeded beyond their wildest dreams.
[em]Emo_79[/em] [/quote]So agree on this! We personally don’t discuss politics or religion (yes it’s in our username so you know our background) but avoid the topics. Let’s be honest it’s not sexy and fun to discuss. We have found out don’t judge the book by the cover (pictures) many a times! Where do people get those filters 😂?
Ways to point out Swingers in public - - I wear a black silicone ring on my pinky finger. The silcone is more comfortable than a hard ring. But never had anyone acknowledge it was a swinger ring. Funny Story. On a first date with a girl that I had asked her # at a dance club. On the first date she said one of her past relationships was with a man that had been a swinger and she didn't want that again. She never swung as far as I know. Awkward! I'm sitting there with my ring on. I wish you couples would line me up with friends you think would enjoy the LS. Sorry, but I'm not getting married again till we have proven to be compatible over time, a long time. 17 years of loyal monogamy so don't give me shit about SM suck and are only validated once they are with a woman. I was happy as a vanilla but wanted to have more fun in many ways. No! sexual expression was not the reason I left. But if sure is fun to finally have my sexual freedom back. Not all will enter the LS by vanilla marriage turned swinger. Any suggestions on how to meet women who would like the LS are welcomed.
Goblin Valley Swingers? - - [quote=RedHedandHusband]I have camped at the state facility at Goblin Valley. GV is amazing to see! The campground was very nice. Ideally there are two sites for tents only that are isolated from the others because they have a whole canyon to themselves!
I think it's a great place[/quote]
Good feedback. It looked like where the group was camping was not in a designated campsite, but more dispersed camping. Sounds like it would be fun and secluded enough for good times.
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - Well the first and biggest thing i can see is communication, especially between the couples before they play. I dont know why its so hard to ask your partner whether it be a girl or guy if this is ok and if not just let them know. Your partner needs to know you are here together to expand your experiences and for them, not so you can be selfish and have it all for yourself.
I dont know why someone would put themselves in a situation they know from the get-go that they are gunna get jealous about. I mean your not stupid you know if your a jealous person either talk with your partner about it or dont do it.
I think the stupid male ego comes into play alot hence why you see it being us guys that start the drama. Ow is he bigger than me, ow is he better than me, ow is she gunna be thinking of him when we have sex, I mean get over yourself!!!! I saw a topic in one of the forums here bout dick size and couldnt believe how many guys are worried bout it. Personally I could care less my woman is with me cause she loves me, its a mutual agreement that we are in this lifestyle not a onesided decision.
I am sorry that you had the bad experience but dont blame yourself and roll with it not all of us are like that. As someone already said body language is a HUGE tell tale sign.
Christain Swingers? - - Me, male half, am a born again, spirit filled child of god. I grew up Penticostal(sp?), but I have since learned to think for myself. I do beleave that Adultry in the bible refeared to cheating. Going behind your husband/wifes back & sleeping with someone else. It is all in how you look at it & its true translation. Look at "Thou shalt not kill". This is NOT you will not kill someone like everyone says. If so David, who killed Golith would have not made it into heaven. God himself helped David kill Golith & he himself killed others. This in itself would mean God committed a sin. The correct, in my eyes & other preachers I have talked with about this, is "Thou shalt not Kill' Means you shall not committ cold blooded murder. It is all in how you take the meaning. So I do beleave you can be a Christain, go to church & still swing. I could get more indepth but will not :).
Swingers In Uniform - Pay your memorial day respects here. - HAving been on the sideline and reading the responses from Don I am compelled to say a thing or two. I for one do not expect anyone to kiss my ass for my having served. Yes I do admit that I worked for those paying taxes and did so freely and of my choice. See I was raised to believe that a person should get over themself and be a part of something that is for the betterment of others. I made the free and conscious decision to serve this country and its people in the service. I have served through at least five of the armed conflicts this country has been part of. Do I expect some genuflection or ass kissing no. Would I expect some respect for what I have done? No I guess I don't expect it. I do appreciate it when it happens but at the same time realize there are those who would make light of it or even as Don seems to do speak disparagingly of it. I guess I find it disconcerting that he supposed served in the Navy and still didn't come away with any greater appreciation of the sacrafices those in uniform make whether in combat or in a support role. If he wants to rant and be a legend in his own mind he is entitled to that. I am just saddened that he has so little respect for others that he would offend people and spout belittlements for people who choose to blieve in something other than themselves. To those who posted negative comments to Don I do appreciate how you can feel so angered as to bring you to want to use bodily harm to shut him up or make a post that will shut him up. At the same time I have to say it is like a phrase my grandfather used to say. "Don't try to teach a pig to sing. It only frustrates you and annoys the pic". IT is better to just ignore him and feel sorry for the small mindedness that doesn't seem to allow him to appreciate or respect others. I for one will feel sorry for him and move on. I do however wonder if Clitty and Don are actually the same person and that they seem to get great satisfaction in disrupting forums and getting people upset. LEt's ignore them and not feed their ego by reacting to them.
ANd I to say God Bless America, the men and women who serve in uniform and the families of these brave men and women.
Kink Community and Fetlife.com - What do you guys think? - [quote=FALLENEROTES]It's a whole different world! We haven't found a whole lot of swingers in the BDSM community but have met some very awesome and open people. We found the "play parties" to be a bit awkward but enjoyed fetish night at area 51 and have also enjoyed some of the educational classes and [size=200]munches[/size]. Overall we found its less about the sex and partying and more about community and education.[/quote]
....what?
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