Patterson Swingers in Iowa

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Messages - why don't people want to message back - 1. All the sites are crawling with fake couple profiles that are pic collectors or guys trying to cheat. 2. People here have the idea of dabbling but are not serious about it. 3. People have their ideal encounter in their head and are only looking for that exact situation. 4. People are simply lazy. They wanna push a button (like the FR one) and let you do all the work. 5. People totally content with swinging are already in an established party or meet group and have people come to them now. They are tons of fun, experienced swingers that know how to balance normal life and swinging life. So we always tell newbs there is a huge learning curve to this lifestyle. No, it’s not the sex part, we all already do that, it’s the ability to sort through the mess and find connections. Living where you do makes it even harder. Try some other sites to see if they fit better. AFF usually has a good listing in your area. Try posting up something when you have free time and see what comes your way. Don’t jump at every friend request. Our experience over 4 years is the blind ones with no message lead no where. We use the sites for first contact, then k!k (you can live pic verify there) and chat to see if it’s a match. Remember it’s a frustrating road ahead. Even after getting to full chat and meeting time, we really only meet 5% of the people we talk to, and we are super flexible and drive many miles to meet and play. Just keep at it. We are to the point now we can spot most flakes, cheaters and collectors quickly and we block and move on. When you do finally meet just be open. Network, be friends, that can lead to parties or new friends. Start looking to just meet cool fucking people and learn from there.

Just for shits and giggles? - Why are you in the lifestyle? - To be honest, I used to be one of those narrow-minded people who thought those in open marriages, swingers, etc. were just people who didn't really love their partner or couldn't "handle" a committed relationship/marriage. Wife and I then discussed the possibility a few years back, my reasoning being that before her, I really hadn't been with many women, and the ones I had been with was more a one time or several times thing, so my experiences were limited, and now that I had "learned what I was doing" a little, my mind was curious on if it was just that my wife loves me and was attracted to me, or if I could please other women. We decided after discussions to try it out. We met up with a couple that was more experienced, thrilling, and the whole experience was a roller coaster ride. Years later, while watching a particular episode of "House, M.D." that deals with a couple who is either in an open marriage or swingers (can't recall), listening to the medical staff characters assassinate the idea of nonmonogamy the way I used to with short-sighted, unfair logic, it made me reflect on how much our views on something can do a 180 when we give it a fair shot. From this, I started wondering things, one of them being whether I actually "knew" if I was straight or not, or just assumed through society and toxic masculinity. I decided that the only way to know would be to open myself up to the idea of trying it and seeing what happened. Through that, I found out that I am at least bi-curious. I've had one sexual experience with another man, and it was both pleasurable and memorable. Haven't had much opportunity outside of that yet to expand and explore further. I guess what I'm saying is we started this wanting to push our perceptions of things and find out what the reality beneath them was, and through that I have enjoyed becoming open to all sorts of new possibilities I never would've imagined. I can't wait to see what the world throws me next to test what I think I know. Thanks all who made it through the novel, I know I rambled a bit. Not a lot of safe spaces to discuss things of this nature out there.

swinging... - - It was my idea at first to swing with some good friends of ours.... Very bad idea..... The swingers site was his idea.... Very good idea!!!!!!

How to hotwife? - My wife wants to become a hotwife - There is a small Salt Lake City centric Hot Wife Play Group in the group section of this site. https://swingular.com/groups.php?_a=view&_GID=436 We have not used the group to sponsor meet and greets, but some members have had success making connections and hooking up. We would not be opposed to holding meet and greets, but the two of us really don’t have the time to make those arrangements. It’s a relatively small group. There are some great couples and some great guys involved. The group's description is as follows: "This is a group specific to Hot Wife Play in and around Salt Lake City. You either have to live in or near Salt Lake City or be a frequent visitor. [b][u]Single men must have a recommendation from a member couple[/u][/b].[b] All members must be verified as "Real" or "VIP" before admittance into the group. [/b] "Hot Wife" is often used synonymous with the term Cuckold, but it is NOT how most swinger couples view "Hot Wife Play" and not at all what this group is about. Hot Wife Play for most of the swingers we know in Salt Lake City, is where the husband feels he has the hottest woman in the world, and wants to share her, and the wife enjoys all the erotic attention his devotion and fantasy creates for her. When in the mood, swinger couples are not looking for a sexual replacement for the husband, but rather a sex life enhancement adventure to share that includes a single man. The single man lucky enough to be a part of this sort of thing must be very respectful. The stuff of fantasy! Not all men measure up. Our wives don't want to be with physically or emotionally mediocre men. Husbands don't want to watch their wives with mediocre men. Polite, respectful, attractive, intelligent and good humored single men can do well in the swing community. Single men need to take the emphasis off of "Hot Wife" as a singular devotion or lifestyle for couples that say "yes" to single men. Consider it more of a fantasy and a pleasure for couples to make a reality, when and if, that is what they desire, and a single man can be part of that reality. Couples swing in other realms and often prefer couples hook ups most of the time. In other words, let's not consider it any more than what it is, a fantasy, and a possible reality that couples can use to hopefully enhance their relationship and single men can use to have sex with an incredibly passionate and orgasmic woman. Swinger couples, like us, sometimes wish to focus our attention on our hot wife's sexual fulfillment. She is so sexy that watching her in passion's full embrace, with another man can be extremely rewarding and erotic. As for me I watch until I can no longer wait to join in and ravish her. When a woman is just so sexually hot, that she is a gift to the world, and her passions and her orgasms cross over into the realm of the sacred, then encouraging select gentlemen, to join in such divine worship of a hot wife's sexuality is a total fucking blast!! That is what this group is about!! Additional tips for single men wishing to join the group : Look good Smell good Have a sense of humor Be respectful Don't be pushy Don't be whiny Be patient Be honest Be healthy Be confident Be willing to host"

New members - Any new members find it hard to meet people on here. - Yes, the lifestyle, like high school, church, and many other things in life that revolve around people in groups large and small, is cliquey. Luckily, many swingers are always on the lookout for fresh meat (that's an impolite way to say people they haven't already fucked) so if you don't mind doing a little homework...and slogging thru a whole BUNCH of profiles, some of which could even be fake...or at least disingenuous, you will eventually find plenty of really awesome people to hang out with and maybe even, if you're lucky, have a little sexy time as well. Nobody ever said this would be easy...they just said it would be worth it! [em]Emo_12[/em]

Vaccine - Do you take vaccine status into account when deciding who to play with. - [quote=FunKinkyDuo][quote=Farkeltwins]Wow, we were under the impression that swingers were smart progressive people but this thread has educated us. It appears that some swingers are racists, knuckle draggers, selfish and just plain stupid. Please keep posting comments as it has been very helpful to us on what we want and don't want![/quote] Your comment clearly shows your own level of “progressive” intelligence, and lack of it. Still happy with your boy Biden running out of Afghanistan and leaving thousands of American civilians and Soldiers there as sitting duck targets? Not sure he could have fucked it up any more ![/quote] What? no “progressive” responses from anyone to my post? Wow, I guess Covid was a perfectly fine topic to bash, trash and categorize anyone with a different view on vaccinations than yours ... but it’s crickets on this topic ... cat got your tongue? hmmm ....Biden will go DOWN in history for this royal fuck up ! And please please please put us on your fucking list of people you don’t want to play with if you think otherwise ... we probably wouldn’t have played with you anyway! ... that is all. 🇺🇸

swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - WAAAAAAA...What a perfect name... The problem is not your spelling, it is the fact that you are in your thirties and still type as if you are a teenager on myspace.com or ae using a phone to text someone... As to the fact that sex is a part of this site, yes it is...BUT it is also a site for people to find, make, and communicate with friends and those with the same mindset.... NOT everyone wants to see a bone thin model, not everyone wants to see a giant vagina spread open, not everyone wants to be in lingere (sp?) all the time....SOME actually want to think and make friends before they hop in the sack...Ever think of that? Quit your bellyaching...Get over yourself...And go make a friend....THATS why people post about things besides sex... THE BIGGEST SEX ORGAN IS YOUR BRAIN, NOT YOUR COCK/PUSSY!!!!!!

interracial pics - how bout some fun pics - Just curious. Why is it most of the interracial pics are black men on white women and not the other way around? Just curious why there doesn't seem to be equal coverage. There were probably 6 or 7 black women on white guys but most were the other way around. Of course, in our case, because we are chinese and there are so few chinese swingers, most every time we play it is interracial. :l

Christain Swingers? - - I believe that a person can be both a good Christian and a swinger. First you have to remember that anyone can use the Bible to prove any point. Many people do this by pointing to a single verse or even part of a verse. This in itself is wrong. You have to take the entire Book into account. Most of what is preached today has no reference in the bible or there are words from God forbidding it. The Bible teaches us not to worship idols but everywhere you look you see crosses and crufixes. The list goes on and on. Today's organized religion is based more on tradition than anything else. The Ten Commandments do teach us to not commit adultry but here is where interpretation is important. The common synonym for adultery is infidelity as well as unfaithfulness or in colloquial speech, cheating. We always know what the other is doing so we are not commiting adultery.

Disabled Swingers - - [quote=LPF_69]My best friend was disabled, and while up until the last month of her life she was not confined to needing mobility assistance, she was active in the lifestyle and very upfront with people about her disability. She was always a BBW, struggling with issues from severe depression and diabetes, her weight fluctuated up and down as a side effect of various medications and changes in medications to manage her primary illness, that being bipolar disorder. Sometimes she had zero sex drive as a side effect of some of the medications for her depression, and sometimes she wanted sex 24/7 (Manic side of the bipolar disorder). She always told anyone that contacted her about her illness from the first contact/reply and would leave it up to them if there was ever to be an in person meeting knowing that she may or may not be able to play. We were friends for over 8 years, and while we were active in the lifestyle as a couple for 2 years we always let others know there was a possibility of the other one of us being around (especially when she was having bad times from her mental illness). She always had a good time when she was able to play, and we met a lot of really good people. So just hang in there, be honest and confident. You will meet people that are willing to play with you once they understand your situation and limitations, and you will have some wonderful times. Larry[/quote] i totally understand where she's coming from with the side effect of the meds. although she shouldn't be having the manic stages unless she goes off the meds. i know how tough those ups and downs can be though. i'm sure some people around here saw me at a few parties and thought i was nuts and/or a very terrible person. i never bothered to explain it to anybody. now i'm medicated properly and it can have its effects as well, but thankfully the new meds don't effect me sexually at this point.