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If you are looking
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New to this all - - Single guys don't exactly have an easy time of it in the swinging world. It's made up mostly of couples with the occasional Unicorn (single female), and many couples have a "we're trading, but you're not providing the female part of the trade" attitude, which goes all the way back to when what is now called swinging was called wife swapping. And the vast majority of couples who are interested in inviting a single person to play with them are looking for a female, not a male. There just aren't very many people looking for a single male, and there are tons of single guys looking to be involved. So the numbers are against you. Besides that, it's hard for a single male to meet people. They're allowed to attend only a very, very few parties and/or events unless they have a female with them. Even the male half of a known swinging couple often isn't welcome if the female half isn't with him. He may be in a couple, but without the woman he's just another single guy.
Your best chance at someone being interested in you is online at a site like this. But, again, there are gazillions more single males than there are people looking for them, so the competition is pretty tough. To be a "winner", you usually need to be relatively young, pretty good looking, and fairly fit. Unlike in the outside world, what the guy looks like is more important than what the girl looks like. So if you want to generate any interest, you have to post pics. And while nudes are a good idea if you have the body for it, straight dick pics are not, unless it's 10 inches long or something. And even then it might be a turn off more than a turn on for lots of people. If you don't have any pics of yourself posted, those difficult odds you face morph into impossible odds.
If you do manage to attend any parties or events, chill. Don't be aggressive. Single males have a rep for assuming that any woman at a swinger's function wants to jump into the sack with them. From what I've seen, most single males aren't really like that, but enough are that single guys get labelled as a group, so the best way to behave is as if the woman you're talking to is someone you just met at some "normal" party. The only real difference between a swinging woman and a "normal" woman, whether she's single or in a couple, is that she doesn't think that it's necessary to be in some kind of a relationship with someone in order to have sex. Female swingers are just as selective as women in general, and while her presence at a swinging party does mean she's interested in sex, she might not be interested right then, or she might not be interested in you. And a good way to turn that interest off if it's there is to act like it's a given that she wants you. The most important thing to remember is that it's always up to the woman. Whether anything happens, and if it does just what happens, is her decision.
So post some pics, be just as respectful to any swinger women you might meet as you would be to any non-swinger woman and if she's part of a couple be respectful to her man, and good luck.
sh*t swingers say - to preach to the choir - HAHAHAH!!! Our two faves --"I'm only bi when I drink." And -- "Next time let's start before 4 in the morning." Loved it!! :D Thanks for the laugh!!
Swingers Next Door! - ABC news story on Swinging! - Okay I just watched NWB on the DVR and I'm not ashamed to say that I smell an Emmy. [em]Emo_84[/em]
Except for that dumb cunt Brittany. Fucking whore has totally been texting ME too. I hope Cody makes her sleep on the couch. [em]Emo_25[/em]
Swingers now officially a high risk group for STDs and STIs - Do your own research - Jesus House flipping Christ! Why is everyone getting their garments in a wad? So you're gonna get cooties by swinging. Big deal. As the great Vladziu Valentine Liberace said, "Ya gotta die of somethin' so it might as well be sex cooties."
*fuckin' HATE nomads...and gypsies (at least the kind who wear those fucking ridiculous wedding dresses-not the stereotypical cliched Hollywood gypsies that are mysterious and have mystical powers and shit)...and sentient murderous dolls and puppets*
What really defines a TRUE swinger? - - [quote=INVITESOME]We never have viewed single males as swingers. To to us and most of our swinging couple friends single males are cheap sex toys you carefully pick from, use them on rare occasions and then return them and forget them. Sounds harsh but the great thing is that is exactly what the majority of single males that we have all met like. We have only met a couple single males out of hundreds that have broken the mold and surprised us. [/quote]
For the record at least our experience we have met far more
couples where one or the other of them is just plain weird than
singles. In fact we almost prefer singles over couples for that
reason. Either way life is too short for bashing fellow Lifestylers.
People should take their bad attitudes & imagined desirability somewhere
else!
What are swingers really looking for ?Are they looking for frien - Has the happen to you. - ok now it is time to be blunt you all appernlty dont know what this is about nor have you got a clue i do realize that you are new but other people have said the same thing to you over and over again not only on this thread but others that you have posted like i belive that cplinjax said if i missed spelled the name i am sorry but people come here to expolre thier wants and desires with like minded people whatever thier comfort level is with others in this area is completly up to the couples in question but from everything you say it seems that you either try to justfiy or explain your stance on what you are looking for i think you two should talk and try to look at it from another persons point of view of what you are sayin you might learn something
Can bieng Mormon (LDS) and a Swinger co-exist? - - Having been raised as a mormon, I always took to heart the teachings that "My Father's house has many manisions"
In my humble opinion, even the mormon church has a place in heaven for all of us swingers. The rank and file members may think and treat us differently, but in the end there is a place for all. It is impossible to reconcile the teachings of any religion with the swinger lifestyle, and we each have to make our own peace with that.
Just my 2 cents for whatever it's worth :)
Mr Closer
Christain Swingers? - - WOW CODA Always room for open minded discussion but that was pretty harsh comparison.
I was on Church Council, the Catholic School board (as president for several years), the Catholic Youth Organization, a room dad (that goodness for a great employer), and rarely if ever missed a field trip. So YES, they can mix and YES I think a fellow board member and her husband were also swingers.
We had gone to church for years with swinger friends and 1/3 of the people at the First Communion of their youngest child were swingers.
NOT MILDLY suggesting that our way was the only way but it CAN work.
GREAT Topic
Young swingers party - sold out, who still wants to party ? - I should probably add that if you didn't get tickets and you'd still like to attend, let me know and I can put you on the waitlist in case someone else cancels... (which, given how many people there are coming, is likely that a few spots will open up).
Sorry for the thread-hijack Looking4Fun.... Back to the topic! Who wants to hang out with M&T? They're HOT! (Can vouch!)
Just looking for other couples happy with super soft and no swap - There must be more of us out there? - Though a bit defeatist, this started off as a reasonable post, and coming from an understandably frustrating overall experience. I am amazed at the level of ignorance following. Everyone getting all defensive about their choices, where they fall in the scheme of things, what I do and you should too. It's so unnecessary. I experience this in SO many different communities... The LGBT community is judgmental and coarse with Bisexual and Trans people, Western Medicine usually moves to deem Eastern medicine totally ineffective before acknowledging its place or use for anything despite its true benefits, in the realm of Non-monogamy the Polyamorous won't have themselves being mixed up with the 'likes' of Swingers, in the Swinger community soft-swappers are passed up as unadventurous. Time and time again I am shown how many adults truly do live with some sort of high school mentality, who is cooler, buys bigger, more liberal, commits greater, goes faster and farther, it is all SO ridiculous and unproductive.
Of course soft-swap can still be satisfying for those who have also done full. I don't think anyone healthy could look at this as a no-turning-back sort of lifestyle. As your life changes and grows so will your preferences and desires. Some of you scoffing at the soft-swappers may find yourself desiring that very thing in the future. And many soft-swappers will evolve into full-swapping. There will always be someone who's views are copacetic with your own, but why aren't there more that are respectful? You can take the time to understand ones position without agreeing with it, and better still, the tried and true "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all." The ridicule is just not necessary. Best of luck to everyone, in all your adventures. I know we could sure use some. :)
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