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does anyone else go through periods of doubt? - as to whether this lifestyle is what they want? - This is a 'lifestyle' and there are many different types of people in it. The definition of a swinger has changed drastically and the description you provided still falls into that definition. A lot of people choose this lifestyle because of it's openness and sexual energy. You don't have to have sex with everyone you meet to be a swinger or be in the lifestyle. Selectivity is a virtue and you have the right. Most swingers rarely hook up with others until they find the 'right' situation. But that doesn't make you less of a swinger than those who do every weekend. Remember, to each his own!

Info for Noobs - - Bored at work today so I thought I would share some thoughts, since I know you have all been waiting for me to say something more. Don't deny it. :) I figured I would share some insights for noobs or just anyone else who will connect with our experiences. I already posted the 101 of what I thought was important, so this will be less rules and more insight. We seem to meet a lot of people who are just beginning and they always have the same questions. So.... The first thing to realize is that swingers are just like everyone else, just kinkier. They don't all fuck sheep (some do) or masterbate in public ( I do), but for the most part are just regular citizens who happen to like exciting sexual adventures. For the most part people are not very pushy, and if they are, you can quickly diffuse them just by being direct and telling them where you stand, or lie, or bend over. :) If they don't, probably a creepy couple who you don't want to see anyway. Most of the house parties we have been to are fairly mellow. Apart from the nakedness there doesn't seem to be a lot of random acts of sex happening all over the place. So don't be afraid to go to the parties, but ask before you go what the party is like. Nobody will rape you unless you like that sort of thing. We were so nervous during our first party that we sat in the car drinking until some people we knew walked us in. By the end of the night, I was the only one in my underwear. Awkward. Not really. There isn't a magical solution to meeting people. You have to make contact, talk to them and eventually meet, hopefully in an environment where you have a quick route of escape if needed. We used to invite new couples to our house for a hot tub night but quickly realized if there was no attraction for us, it was often times hard to politely get them to leave. So coffee, drinks something simple is best. We have met some of our greatest friends in the LS and are sure to meet more. The people tend to be open minded, friendly, educated and fun to be around. So even if you don't intend on playing with someone you might keep the option open for a lasting friendship, though some on the site are definitely NOT looking for that. You can figure that out pretty quickly. The Sinful parties are a great, no pressure way to meet people. Shout out to J & A (and M, I never forget M). :) The Orchard parties tend to get a little more rambunctious, but only upstairs, at least at the venue by Brewvies. So it is also a good place to go if you want to just chill, or if you want to be a little more daring and see sex or have sex. We haven't been to as many manor parties, but they are well done and seem casual as well. Don't think we have ever seen any sexual acts at Manor. Habits is definitely turning out to be a swinger's hangout. Saturdays seem to be the biggest turnout for the LS. Can be some creepers there but for the most part it is fun and entertaining. Not our favorite but will do in a pinch. Our name is SameRoomOnly because when we started we were only having sex with each other, in front of others and figured we would never full swap. We learned quickly that rules are easily broken and that it is best to learn to communicate on the spot in any situation. We use hand gestures and do have a few code words if needed, though typically most people are very happy to hear open communication about what others in the situation want. We certainly do. If you don't want that ninth orgasm in a row, just tell me, I will back off. No hard feelings. Well, we have come a long way from SameRoomOnly. And here we are. Maybe a bit smarter, a lot kinkier and have a lot of fun experiences behind and ahead of us. I am raising my imaginary glass of bourbon to all of you we have met and to the good times. Cheers.

Young swingers party - sold out, who still wants to party ? - [quote=RECON]It's funny how it says young swingers party for those under 45. Such a percentage of the peeps who RSVP'd are over that, or are lying. [/quote] I went through the RSVP list and found a total of 2 people over the age limit.... And, of course, just because someone clicks the RSVP button doesn't mean they have a ticket. (Those 2 folks had NOT purchased a ticket.. the system wouldn't let them even if they tried).

Anyone else in or near Daybreak? - We know you are out there! - [quote=PLAYNW3][quote=MEOWMIX10000][quote=PLAYNW3]What ever came of the Daybreak swingers Facebook page? Is it active and being used?[/quote] pretty slow. a couple people talk and post pics. most people just lurk. We need more people. Could be a great group[/quote] We worry about our kids etc finding it, that's why we haven't joined the Facebook group. We'd like to hear what's going on but really don't trust Facebook for this type of communication.[/quote] Yeah, actually I don't blame you. We worry about that too.

Do you Expect to get laid at Swinger Parties? - - Most of the time, no. Not everybody at a swingers party expects to have sex. But sometimes it depends on the party you go to. Off-premise parties like those thrown by Secret Desires www.secretdesires.org are a great way to meet others in the Lifestyle without the pressure of having sex. I'd recommend checking this out first, the next party is on the 10th of Feb.

At what point do you out yourselves to family and friends?? - - Most of our long-term friends know we've always had an "open relationship" (and the guys are all jealous LOL), and a couple of my wife's close girlfriends know about the nature of the "clubs" we go to on weekends sometimes. (We've even managed to play with one or two of those friends ;) ) As for family, we'd never tell either side. Hers would have a real hard time I think, my siblings are younger than me but not kids anymore and probably wouldn't care. I'd say both sides would be comfortable with a "don't ask, don't tell" philosophy. Just a comment on Dr. Ziggy's post - we're the "live & let live type," and we're not at all ashamed of what we do. We wouldn't care if the whole world knew if it didn't affect our lives, but the reality would be very different, I'm sure. A new swing friend once asked how I'd feel if our kids became swingers one day. My response was that, if they were making a responsible decision when they did so, that I'd hope they find as much enjoyment in it as we have. He said that was the first time anyone had ever given him that answer, and it was the one he was looking for.

Female sex fantasies. - What do women really think about sex? - We understand and respect that a lot of swingers, possibly more women than men, really don't like comments posted on their profiles. The whole kiss and tell mindset. Still, comments about a couple, at least somewhat verify, that both the wife and the husband are willing partners in this adventure. As for time spent online, there are far fewer wives that seem to spend more time online in this site than their husbands. Once Mrs. Delicious has established a high level of trust in a FWB relationship, be it couples, singles, whatever, she has no problem just giving people her phone number. As for these chat rooms whose names won't show up due to censorship in threads in the forums, or emails within this site, she has had enough creeper experience, that for her it can be a total buzz kill. Let's face it, people who comment in the forums, can and do get jumped on too. Ladies, that do the initial responding to emails get even more abuse. She will get involved online, if someone contacting us really interest her and she feel like it's a safe and sexy possibility. Possibly, that is why far fewer wives seem to comment in the forums. Honestly, isn't it also mostly, for the same reason far more single men have memberships than single women? Men generally tend to be a bit more sex-centric, and women that have similar libidos are at risk, and judged because of it, even by some within this community? As for control, once we meet someone in the flesh, our lady, as is the case with quite a few swinger couples, tends to sit in the driver's seat more often than not. As for our profile, yes, her sex druthers, are very much the cornerstone!

couples more [oft ] ask for couples or single females. why is th - - We havent had a lot of experience with single males or single females....or 3somes all together, really......however, the one time that we did show interest in a single male for my pleasure (Mrs. Stitch typen) we had a really bad experience in finding one that was honest with why he was in this lifestyle all together. When we found a male we were interested in and we met up for some fun...the fun happened and after we found out the truth of his reality...and that was that his WIFE didnt put out at all, and he was really a married man with 3 small children looken for sex without strings. NOw the "sex without strings" thing is not what bothered me, however, the wife and 3 small children thing bothered me a great deal for very long time after that night. We (hubby and I) were both really upset by it, and wasnt looken for an experience that contributed to someone getting really hurt, and lied to. Sad thing is, we still see him lingering on the websites for swingers and being quite active in the lifestyle. I realize that just the bad actions of one single male doesnt mean that all single males are the same.....we also realize that there are probably some single women that are also cheating as well. After that bad experience we both decided that if we wanted a 3some experience it would have to be with ppl that we knew and trusted and really knew their life story. We decided that we wanted to just meet some fun couples and stick with married, stable couples that are looking for the same fun as we are. We dont ever want to contribute to breaking up a marriage and hurting someone else, we just want to have fun!!!

Just looking for other couples happy with super soft and no swap - There must be more of us out there? - This subject is whats making it hard for us real swingers to find real friends !!!! I dont think they are trying to be mean by saying face book is a good place for ya they are just being honest ...... But I hope u find what your looking for dont really see much fun in it though !!! But each there own ... Just sayin ... Thanx J

Single Male Market - Need feedback on a feature idea. - Unicorns, are just that, unicorns. Couples play is fucking fantastic, when there is something approaching equal shared chemistry, involving everyone involved. So for a lot couples, couples hookups, and or friendships with benefits are kind of a priority, at least when they first start to investigate the lifestyle. So a couples agrees to purchase a membership, establish a profile, see what's out there, and, not long after they get started they get approached by some goof ball single males. If perchance they either start a forum discussion about what's happening, or begin to read a forum post, someone already started on single males, there will be some measure of negative expressions about single males. Goof balls will be goof balls. In our experience it's pretty easy to brush off a goof ball. Not all of the single men on this site are goof balls. The question is often posed, if a guy is worthwhile, why is he single? That question is a perfect fit for the goof balls. There are men however, (women too), that may not be interested in marriage, or that are charming enough they can find sex partners, and therefore can be patient and get married once they have found the right person. If a guy is charming, wants to be sexually active, but wants to avoid sex evolving into a what does this all mean, dance around commitment, and he discovers that some swingers, occasionally want to meet with just such a guy, mostly just so he can get all entwined in passions hot embrace, deep inside the hot wife, and some of these wives are very, very hot; well, he might throw his lot in and establish a profile. We have had a lot of fun with these sorts of select single men. Comments attached to a single males profile are already a rating system. If a guy gets glowing reviews from couples that you know are real, then that says something. Traits found in select single men: Confident not cocky. Patient not pushy. Charming. Interested and interesting.