Rosemead Swingers in California

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Question for the ladies - - "We totally agree with Valence and Hunt. We're not sure why size is such a big deal. I'm your average 6" and don't feel like I have any reason to feel ashamed about it. The one person it should matter to loves it the way it is. " No one here said small guys should be ashamed, As usuall the insecure guys here all came out to complain even though none of the original post was directed at them in anyway. If your wife is happy with what you got great. This is my wifes play time, she wants what she wants. She doesn't settle for what ever is offered. Why should she? "We love the point about women who layer/pushup/tighten or whatever else to make themselves look better with clothes on. Wouldn't it be the same disappointment when the clothes come off as you have had with these single men that weren't the size they said they were. " We Always provide full nude pics of her to good candidates, nothing left to guess. He knows what he is getting. Most swingers and adult sites always show the woman in various stages of undress. More than I can say for the men. You usually never see them there. Mine are in our private pics so anyone we wish to play with can see them. "we Having said that, we would also find it upsetting that he had lied about his size if that was indeed what was important to you. So maybe force the single men in the future to provide a picture with their unit being measured with a ruler, then you should know exactly what you're getting. " Some will do this, the rest get all defensive when asked. 99% of the ones who send pics try to fake them so their real size will not show. We don't play with just anyone regardless of looks or size. If there is no physical attraction it won't happen. In our own experience most couples are quite selective. We are too ands thats our right. None of the original post by us was ever directed at any guy on here. No need to get all defensive and complain. Your manhood is not in question. I knew when we brought the question up what would happen but the wife wanted to ask others their experiences.

2 Year Anniversary Party for Swingers in Knoxville,Tn. - BYOB, On-premise Swingers Party - Destiny's 2 Year Anniversary Party Saturday night, March 11th 8pm until ??? Quality Inn Motel Callahan Road Exit #110 2nd Floor Meeting rooms (above Lobby) BYOB, On-premise, with decorations throughout the dancing, eating, and seating area. Private play areas and open play areas are sectioned off for your fun and games. We have several games to play, if you like strip poker, strip bingo, or toss the rings around the 3' inflated cock, and we have two other games people like to play also, called "pin the cock on the stud, and pin the boobs on the gal". Guarantee you'll enjoy yourself and have fun while you're there. Rules and guidelines are posted on the web sites for more information. http://www.webspawner.com/users/destinyssocials/index.html http://www.webspawner.com/users/destinytw39/index.html There is a door donation to attend. Hope to see you there!!! Take Care, Play Safe, and Enjoy Life......Tammy

Info for Noobs - - Bored at work today so I thought I would share some thoughts, since I know you have all been waiting for me to say something more. Don't deny it. :) I figured I would share some insights for noobs or just anyone else who will connect with our experiences. I already posted the 101 of what I thought was important, so this will be less rules and more insight. We seem to meet a lot of people who are just beginning and they always have the same questions. So.... The first thing to realize is that swingers are just like everyone else, just kinkier. They don't all fuck sheep (some do) or masterbate in public ( I do), but for the most part are just regular citizens who happen to like exciting sexual adventures. For the most part people are not very pushy, and if they are, you can quickly diffuse them just by being direct and telling them where you stand, or lie, or bend over. :) If they don't, probably a creepy couple who you don't want to see anyway. Most of the house parties we have been to are fairly mellow. Apart from the nakedness there doesn't seem to be a lot of random acts of sex happening all over the place. So don't be afraid to go to the parties, but ask before you go what the party is like. Nobody will rape you unless you like that sort of thing. We were so nervous during our first party that we sat in the car drinking until some people we knew walked us in. By the end of the night, I was the only one in my underwear. Awkward. Not really. There isn't a magical solution to meeting people. You have to make contact, talk to them and eventually meet, hopefully in an environment where you have a quick route of escape if needed. We used to invite new couples to our house for a hot tub night but quickly realized if there was no attraction for us, it was often times hard to politely get them to leave. So coffee, drinks something simple is best. We have met some of our greatest friends in the LS and are sure to meet more. The people tend to be open minded, friendly, educated and fun to be around. So even if you don't intend on playing with someone you might keep the option open for a lasting friendship, though some on the site are definitely NOT looking for that. You can figure that out pretty quickly. The Sinful parties are a great, no pressure way to meet people. Shout out to J & A (and M, I never forget M). :) The Orchard parties tend to get a little more rambunctious, but only upstairs, at least at the venue by Brewvies. So it is also a good place to go if you want to just chill, or if you want to be a little more daring and see sex or have sex. We haven't been to as many manor parties, but they are well done and seem casual as well. Don't think we have ever seen any sexual acts and Manor. Habits is definitely turning out to be a swinger's hangout. Saturdays seem to be the biggest turnout for the LS. Can be some creepers there but for the most part is fun and entertaining. Not our favorite but will do in a pinch. Our name is SameRoomOnly because when we started we were only having sex with each other, in front of others and figured we would never full swap. We learned quickly that rules are easily broken and that it is best to learn to communicate on the spot in any situation. We use hand gestures and do have a few code words if needed, though typically most people are very happy to hear open communication about what others in the situation want. We certainly do. If you don't want that ninth orgasm in a row, just tell me, I will back off. No hard feelings. Well, we have come a long way from SameRoomOnly. And here we are. Maybe a bit smarter, a lot kinkier and have a lot of fun experiences behind and ahead of us. I am raising my imaginary glass of bourbon to all of you we have met and to the good times. Cheers.

Thank you Lifestyle. - A commentary about our journey - Thanksgiving just passed us by and Xmas and the New Year are quickly approaching. I thought I would take a long moment of my time, and your time if you are reading this, to tell this massive entity, called the "Lifestyle" how it has changed me this year. We have been in the Lifestyle for a little over a year and a half. We don't even like the name lifestyle. We prefer "kinky" or "adventurous" or even just "fun as hell", but it seems the term will be around for awhile longer. The wife and I often ponder what exactly the Lifestyle is. Is it a certain set of rules and guidelines that we all live in? Is it the same for us as it is for everyone else? How often does it hurt marriage or relationships and how often does it help? Do we regret our decision to enter into it? When we first tip-toed into the waters we were intimidated, in awe and totally unprepared for what we would experience. It all seemed magical and sometimes scary. We have and had a great marriage and thought we wanted a new, kinky adventure together. We planned to go slow and we would be fine, we were certain. But we were nervous. We were so sloshed at our first Sinful party that we irritated a few people there, no doubt, and probably made asses of ourselves. We still do that sometimes, but now we do it conscientiously. But we grew and learned quickly and have morphed into what we are today (huge asses). Interestingly enough, a few years before we entered the LS, we thought swingers were all gross, dirty, sexually infected people ( I am still not ruling some of you out). We had met a couple that harassed us at every opportunity and were the "creepy" type. Now we know people may think of us the same way if they found out, which is sad, because we like to be honest and open with all of our friends. So, like many of you, it is a secret we keep. It is a trade off for doing what we do. So what have I learned? How have I changed? I have always been a non-judgmental person by most standards, but still I had strong opinions about certain things. One spouse, one partner; that is how it should be done. So what changed? First off, our communication started to blossom about all sorts of things once my wife left her religion. I won't mention names, but it begins with an L and ends in DS. We talked and talked and talked and the more we talked the more we realized that we both had kinky minds and that maybe we should "experiment". So, we made some rules, actually a LOT of rules, and entered the ring. Still thinking one spouse, one partner, but maybe, just maybe we could play in the same room as other people. How kinky is that? Hence our name...sameroomonly. Well, as some of you know, the lifestyle is a monstrous, living, breathing beast and can quickly drag you to places you never thought possible. We made some mistakes, had some great times and just fumbled our way through for a few months trying to figure out where our lines were and what we should or shouldn't do. Then we got smart. We learned to communicate again, like we used to do privately, only now we could do it with other people around. And it was refreshing. No more secret code words (well, sometimes) and no more wondering if what one of us was doing was not condoned by the other. So that is the first thing I think the LS has helped us with. Communication. We communicate like mother fuckers. Better than all of our non-lifestyle friends, for the most part. Are we always amazing and never have bumps? Of course not. Anyone who says they never have drama are either liars or delusional. So thank you lifestyle for our ability to exchange ideas and to be more honest with each other, always. The next thing we found was that we were making friends at a very fast pace. We made a kik group and had our first party with about 40 people up in Park City only 5 or so months after joining the website. It was a blast. We still host parties and invite new people all the time. We enjoy introducing new friends with old friends. Wait, did I say friends or fuck buddies? Don't we sleep with all of our friends? Isn't that the expectation? Not for us. We have made friends that we know will be around until we are all old and gray. We have lost friends because we wouldn't fuck. There are whole discussions on these forums about how some just want to meet and fuck, because this is a swinging site, not a friend site. And to each their own. We don't judge, but for us the rewards of our friendships have far outweighed the 10 or 20 seconds of amazing sex. We have friends around the world that we never would have met without the LS. So to the lifestyle, I say thank you for all of the wonderful friends we have made. Love you all, some more than others ( you know who I am talking about). :) The LS has also taught me to be less judgmental and to avoid using words like "never" or "always". Life is full of gray areas and has lost much of its black and white features. Oh sure, I still judge, have preferences and prejudices, but we all do. I just really believe in walking in another's shoes before I make any decisions about someone's life. So lifestyle, thank you for making me more understanding of other people. Last of all, I just want to say that the sexual journey has been amazing. We have shared many hot, sexy and intimate times with some of you and we have come to realize how similar we all are. We all like sex, we all have a kinky side, or else we wouldn't be here. I have done things that I never imagined would ever happen, with some of the sexiest, most beautiful people I have ever met. I have shared intimate moments with people I care deeply about and others that were just passing through. All have their high points. I have experienced more than most people would even dream about, as have most of you. We are the select who choose to follow our dreams and fantasies. I think we are fortunate. So lifestyle, thank you for all the amazing sex. In the end the lifestyle is different for everyone. It is a whole sub universe in the middle of a "normal" society. Sometimes we have to walk among the shadows to keep our secret, but totally worth it. I would never trade the LS for my wonderful marriage and think I am the luckiest man alive to be married to my beautiful, amazing wife who has shared this journey with me. Love you, Babe. As with everything in life, there will be people who read this and like it, some who don't care and some who disagree or will want to pick it to pieces. That is what makes this amazing. There are so many wonderful, different people and the lifestyle is a perfect diving board to jump into the sea of waiting bodies and personalities. So if you are new, jump in, explore and learn. If you are old school, help others to weather the bumps and keep exploring. Long live the lifestyle. That is a little about my journey, how about you? I encourage anyone to add what they think or feel the LS has done for them, even negative things. Merry xmas to everyone and hope to meet some of you new people. And to my friends, I care about each and every one of you. The Mr.

Age quesiton - Do swingers of the same age group swing together? - We try to meet everyone, we have met alot of people that are close to our age, some are awesome and we clicked with on more than one level and others not at all. When we first signed up we put noone over the age of 30, then it changed to 35, then 40, and now we have no preference. We have found though that most people older than us are more mature and settled. Not everyone of course and I'm not trying to be rude but that's just what we have noticed. We do not always play with everyone we meet just those that we all connect in some way and as long as it's what everyone wants. Some of the people we have met on here we have never played with but they are some of our best friends now and at the same time some people we have played with we havent spoken to since we played. Just depends with everyone I guess. Hope this novel helped lol, it's just what has worked for us. Good luck!! Mrs.

Reply or don't reply for requests to meet? - - Their emotional response probably has more to do with their over all experience with the lifestyle than to anything you said or didn't say did or didn't do. Here goes my thoughts..... People have a hard time emotionally disconnecting. People can be irrational. Sometimes we do not know why the react as they do but then we do not know the back story. They, or we may be associating something they, or we said with a whole lot of experience that had nothing to do with our or their intent. Our primitive brain functions which include release of the chemicals that color emotions have full access to our prefrontal cortex where we have the power of reason. With all the reasoning capability our prefrontal cortex manifest, it has very, very little ability to turn off our more primitive brain. The pathways just are not there. So our primitive brain has full chemical access to our bodies and higher brain but our higher brains do not have equal access to alter our primitive brain and emotional responses. So we have an emotional reaction, which our reasoning cannot turn off, so in order to try and make our minds match the emotion we are feeling we alter our reasoning. It is called making a mountain out of a mole hill. This loss of reason manifests as irrational behavior and can lead to resentment and negative premeditations such as revenge and violence. Sex drive is emotionally charged. Sex chemicals defy reason more than most and so do the chemicals associated with anger. So the brain function design flaw can make the emotion verses reason imbalance more dramatic when sex is involved. Knowing that, Swingers should recognize that just because you feel angry it does not mean you should be angry. If you let negative emotions color your reason you may be acting irrationally. Drama, drama, drama is what you get. Our rational, reasonable minds are capable of unbelievable accomplishments. Through the scientific method we have cured many, many diseases, we fly all over the globe, we travel and live beyond our atmosphere and under the sea, we share and communicate with small hand held devices and we even form internet social groups that revolve around specific shared interest. The sphere of accomplishments is too long a list to name let alone full understand. No one person can understand or master one, one millionth of all that has to be learned and mastered to make all this happen. So we are capable of incomprehensible collaborative efforts. And yet, we fight and we bicker and we accuse and we are sometimes unreasonably suspicious. Reason without emotion is perhaps safe but not much fun. We want to experience emotions with friends and lovers. The secret answer to successful social interaction almost seems to be to master the art of recognizing when something is positive and healthy and then let the flood gates open up jump in and be overwhelmed and if something is just not right to back off physically but to also emotionally disconnect. The something that is just not right, that may be leading you into angry, sad, or fearful paths may be more within you than without as well. If what is inside you is ugly or afraid emotionally and you let that color your reason then that may be all you can see in people and the world without and you get caught in a vortex of anger or fear. People think they become emotional because of their paranoia but in fact they become paranoid because they were negatively emotional and then the paranoia fed the emotions and on and on. I have attached a link to a video I found this week quite by accident that speaks to this and quite a bit more. For you that are into physics professionally or as amateurs, that will enjoy scrutinizing the math, as far as the math goes, to me I see where this is going but the statement is made

What is up with Utah?! - Swingers in Utah and nowhere else? - Utah still remains the proverbial Mecca of swinging (at least of the places we have traveled/lived); we can't wait to come back! In fact, I think we shall hit the road tonight.... :) J&L

Same Sex Marriage - If you support - Simply put... Who are WE (as swingers) to talk about the definition of marriage? Who are WE to judge the "Tradition" of marriage or the "Traditional" definition of marriage? And what does gay marriage have to do with us as swingers? Since we, as swingers, demand the freedom to do with our relationships - and our marriages - as we will, shouldn't everyone be allowed equal freedom? Regardless of their sexual orientation? Marriage should be open to all. Period. A swinger talking about and trying to defend the "traditional" marriage is simply laughable, hypocritical bullshit to me. -Mr. K_T

Respect...Needed? or just forgotten. - - The various points that have been made are well taken. We have been approached by people who are rude or crass. Typically it is a single male, often married pretending to be single or the de facto single male -- half of a vanilla couple pretending to be a swinging couple. I have several observations: This single male is far more likely to be a trial member. They have little or no real knowledge of swinging and it shows. They don\'t expect to be invited to join the couple or single female they approach. They simply find a cheap thrill in the crass sexaulity of the rude note they send. (I suspect they type them with one hand.) If given the oportunity (which their approach itself precludes) they would not play. Don\'t confuse them with the polite & respectful single males that are a part of swinging. We jokingly refer to them as hard-ons. They think because they once had a hard on -- they are qualified to swing. My FAVORITES are the ones that will \"let you watch\" or \"don\'t mind if you joins in\" as if somehow by their offer alone -- Belinda becomes theirs. You will see them at the clubs. Somehow they come up with the courage to go to a swingers club that allows single males. They are the males that hide in a corner too afraid to approach anyone or they are the males that come into the room with attitude written all over them -- as if saying \"I paid my fees -- who do I get to fuck\". If he is found out, the male half of the vanilla couple will stamp and stammer and claim that either he has his wife\'s permission or that she is cold and he is not getting any at home. Given their approach to sex. I have figured out, at least in part, why they are not getting any at home. I was raised by a very southern, very polite, Daughters of the Confederacy -- mother. Thus I had to endure the suffering born of numerous catillions or formal dances. Everyone knew everyone at the dances. Everyone knew that everyone was there to dance. But you went through the rituals of an introduction and small talk -- prior to dancing. While this analogy ignores the aspects of friendship that are a part of swinging. I have found that the manners I learned at my mothers knee have served me well in swinging. (Don\'t ya know that would shock the hell out of her!)

Tooele swingers party 2 - Doing our second party - So have to move the party back again sadly we just suffered a loss in my family and have other plans now. We will post the new date soon