Rules for Single Men

As a single male in the swinging lifestyle, you already have it hard. Single men outnumber both single women and couples 20 to 1. Combine that with the fact that swingers have a terrible perception of you and you get the point. So here are some rules that may help you in your search for swingers.

• Don't be lecherous.
• Stand out from the crowd. There are a zillion single guys out there. Make yourself stand out from the crowd in your profile. Have a complete and well thought-out profile, not just one-sentence answers to the essay questions. Don't get too into the sex acts themselves; tell what you have to bring to the table besides a great tongue and a huge cock. Virtually every profile goes on and on about how they love to give and receive oral. Not original. Be different. Keep it PG-rated and upscale. Also, write your profile in a word processing program and grammar and spell check it, then cut and paste.
• Quality over quantity. A quickly written, misspelled profile with poor grammar says a lot about your commitment to the whole deal. Quickly written profiles look like some guy threw it up on Wednesday night because he came across the site while looking at porn, he was über-horny and was hoping to find a couple to get with by Friday.
• It's not about size. Some are turned on by cock size and cock shots. Most couples are not. Don't list the size of your dick in your profile. Put a G or PG photo in your profile, head and full body. If a couple is really into the size thing they'll ask you. Otherwise assume that whatever your cock size is, it's just fine if they like everything else about you.
• Dispel misconceptions. I think this is a common misconception for single guys wanting to get into the swinging world. They think all that counts is their dick, and couples must be looking for a bigger one than hubby has. Sometimes true, mostly not. Browse some couple profiles and only infrequently will you find the size of the husband's cock listed. Take this as your cue. In most cases, it's not the cock, it's the person it's attached to we're interested in.
• Be a paid member. Be a paid member of a site. Free members go back to the über-horny guy trying to get laid by the weekend. The way we see it, if you are willing to drop the cash to be a paid member, on the remote chance you'll get lucky, you are more serious about pursuing the lifestyle and thus have a better chance with us.
• Don't mass email couples. Yes, we know each other and we compare notes. Before we answer an email from a single male we check with some friends and see if they got an email from him too. If they did, "Sorry, not interested" is the reply. It shows that we weren't special and all the crap about the Mrs. being sexy and hot was just a line of hooey spewed by a horny guy at 1:00 AM.
• Be respectful in your approach. Speaking of that, I would rather see an email from a single guy saying something like "you are an attractive couple and I'd like to get to know you" rather than "she is so hot, I'd like to get with you guys." When I see that I think to myself "Thanks, I think my wife is hot, too, but I'm not her pimp. I'm as much a part of this as she is. You are not 'getting' with my wife, you are 'getting' with us." Once again: "Sorry, no thanks."
• Show respect. Be respectful. It amazes me the stuff a guy will say to us (meaning Mrs. W3) because we are swingers. Stuff he'd never say to a single gal he was trying to pick up because he'd get shot down if he did. So why does he think it will work with my wife? Yes, we're in this for sexual fun, but she is my wife. I am her husband. Treat her, and me, with the respect we and our relationship deserve and you'll have the time of your life.
• Understand your role. Understand your role in the big scheme of things. As much as your fantasy is to get kinky with a couple, their fantasy is a threesome with another male. You are helping them fulfill their fantasies, and in turn they'll help you fulfill yours.
• Attend lifestyle events. Find the swinger parties in your area and attend them. Not just the naked parties, but meet and greets where nothing is going on but talking. This is one of the best ways to get in. Just be charming and not pushy. We know you want to get laid and we can help you with that if we like you.
• Be generous. If you happen to hit it off with a couple, offer to pay at least ½ of the hotel room. It's always appreciated.
• Don't monopolize. Don't sit at the bar all night and monopolize a couple and expect to swing with them later in the evening.

Following these guidelines won't guarantee success, but they will significantly improve your chances in the lifestyle. Remember, respect, patience, and genuine interest in the couple (not just the female half) are key to building connections in this community.